Worldwide, it’s getting harder to retain all our body parts.


Ack. It’s only Monday, and we’re already half-submerged in news about things being cut off.

In Israel, a regional Chief Rabbi active in the religious Zionist movement vowed to defend Migron, an unauthorized Jewish settlement near Ramallah in the West Bank: “Whoever raises a hand on Migron will have it cut off and the prime minister should know that.”

In Afghanistan, 15 men and two women were killed by the Taliban, some of them beheaded. Why? Because they went to a party where they listened to music and the men watched the women dance.

Back in the USA, the American Academy of Pediatrics has issued a new policy about circumcision which states that the health benefits of the decreasingly popular (here) but still common procedure outweigh its risks. While not advocating circumcision, the pediatricians’ new consensus view holds that it’s a beneficial procedure that should be available and covered by insurance.

And in the real USA – Pulaski County, Arkansas, which includes the state capitol, Little Rock – a woman has been charged with “assault, battery and terroristic threatening” after attacking an acquaintance and cutting off the head of the stuffed animal the attacker had come to pick up. Evidently Deborah Koon wasn’t a member of Arkansas for Animals.

It all makes a kind of horrible sense. Fringe Jews, Fringe Muslims, Jewish-Muslim mutilation rituals, and “terroristic threatening” in Bill Clinton’s fatherland. Something’s coming. Something’s definitely coming.

Maybe, just to be safe, we – we men, anyway, circumcised or not – should be following the advice of the Taiwanese Environmental Protection minister, and sitting down when we urinate.